Our 6 Human Needs
We as a human being all have the same blueprint when it comes to emotional fulfillment. There are six fundamental needs that when filled make us feel happiness. These needs, shaped by our values and beliefs, drive all our behaviours. We get these needs met through past times, careers, hobbies and time investments. These needs are;
Certainty / Security / Stability (important for women generally)
Significance / Importance (important for men generally)
Love / Connection (a lack of = Depression )
Contribution to another**
** These last two are the needs of the SOUL. Meeting these two needs causes us to experience fulfilment. The first four are needs of the ego or unconscious mind. This is the part of us that's in control of our behaviour until we consciously set a new habit, or establish a new desired behaviour.
Working from the needs of the soul will immediately start to heal an issue. But first you need to understand what is the ego is trying to achieve, otherwise you will find yourself running automatic behaviours you feel you have no control over. And if you don't like it, but don't stop to fix it, you end up perpetuating it, even into your children because WHAT YOU RESIST, PERSISTS.
The key steps to dissolving your ego (unwanted behaviours, thoughts, beliefs) are,
1. Understand that you are not your ego. Just like you are not your toenails - it's a part of you that you need to manage otherwise it grows out of control!! (lol, clip clip) The Ego is an odd but very useful tool - much like toenails - designed to protect us initally, but as we mature it can be used to make us look good (when we use them positively - ok maybe that one is more for the women - work with me on this - you ever explained a spiritual tool like a body part?! )
Anyhoo, the unmanaged Ego is a bit like an unmanaged 6 year old! It's designed to trip us up, kind of like lonnngg toenails (eugh) or give us a nasty scratch when we least expect it! If we dont manage it well and often, they can get sharp and snag and rip or get dirty and ingrow and cause us pain! So the solution? JUST like overgrown toenails, Stop, Look, Manage, and Polish (your new actions) to keep your toenails, er I mean Ego in check.
2. So at the early stages of your spiritual awakening, it's really important to separate you as a whole from your Ego. It's a bit like velcro, it sticks strong till you consciously seperate it, and just like velcro, it takes a little more effort the first time you try, and then it gets pretty easy.
3. Now you are detached from your Ego, and you know it's the self protective part of you, you get to turn around and look at it and observe what it was trying to get you to notice. Maybe it had to get long and hard and brittle before you stopped and paid it any attention - maybe not so much, depends how long you were asleep on the job for ;o)
4. So the Ego, as a part of you, is not the all of you, so what is? Think of a game of football, you have the Mind in the middle - aka the Referee who's trying to ensure the game is being played well between the two opposing sides, the 'Soul Survivors' and the 'Ego Bulls', who are playing the same game but going in opposite directions, pushing you towards the goals!
Now the Ref can get a bit confused at times as to who is playing according to the rules, it can get a bit messy, but they have to make a decision and figure it out somehow (thank God they have external support these days :o) The score board is reflective of how well the 6 Human Needs are being filled as both sides play in the 'Game of Life'.
By filling up all your needs to the maximum, you are filling your cup up and it overflows with joy. Even if you just focused on this aspect, you would be thriving at life. So remember, The Ego, Mind and Soul are all parts of you, the major players, and when they all work together, and do their jobs properly with your mind refereeing the game, wow, then you get into Conscious Creative Mastery, and then life becomes an art form. Then the creator of the game is looking at you and smiling.
My advice? Keep playing till you win :o)